


The Memelord and the Len Wannabe [DISCONTINUED]

by orphan_account



Category: Vocaloid
Genre: M/M, Not Beta Read, just a bunch of shitposts tbh
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-16
Updated: 2020-01-02
Packaged: 2021-02-25 22:20:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 5,255
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21812821
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Stupid and short oneshots ft. Fukase/Oliver and some other ships prolly ♡ॢ₍⸍⸌̣ʷ̣̫⸍̣⸌₎edit (1/5/2020): i’ve decided to discontinue this for personal reasons. i might start it back up one day tho.
Relationships: Fukase/OLIVER (Vocaloid), Hatsune Miku/Kagamine Rin
Comments: 7
Kudos: 49





	1. the smug bastard gets exposed

“How’s the weather _down there?_ ”

Oliver huffed as Fukase’s cheeky voice rang through his ears. The redhead loved annoying him for his height, which was a measly 5’0”, while he stood at 5’6” (or so he said).

Oliver continued to fix his collar in the mirror as Fukase came to his view in the reflection. He decided not to let it get to him this time.

“Just fine, thanks.”

Fukase’s previously smirking expression changed to one of mock-pity.

“It’s sad, y’know,” He sighed, and Oliver wanted to tell him to stop being so dramatic. “having to see all of you _shorties_ prance around on stage while knowing you could never be as tall as me. You, Piko, Len...”

At that, Oliver spun around, secretly fuming at the fact that he had to look up to meet Fukase’s eyes.

“We all know you’re only taller than Len because of your heels!”

It was true. Without the help of the 2-inch heels he wore, he and Len both stood at 5’4”. Still, Fukase glared right back at him, as if he had said the most insulting thing in the world.

Then, he flicked Oliver’s forehead and turned on his heel (no pun intended), calling back over his shoulder:

“You’re dead to me.”


	2. video games and ~TENSION~

After an hour straight (and thirty minutes gay) of Fukase yelling _”Wait, go back! You missed a coin!”_ and _”Ugh, you’re doing it all wrong!”_ behind him, Oliver had decided enough was enough. He looked back at Fukase, an innocent smile covering up his true frustration.

“Why don’t you play it and show me how it’s done, then?”

Fukase’s eyes widened a little, caught off guard, but he immediately shook it away. He scoffed, crawling over the back of the couch and plopping himself down next to Oliver.

“Fine.” He said as snatched the DS out of the British boys hands. Oliver watched closely as he started the game from the last checkpoint.

Mario came back to life on screen, running forwards and jumping up to hit blocks in order to gain the coins within them. Everything was going smoothly until a Goomba showed up, another following close behind. Almost immediately, Mario was down once more with the famous “Game Over” jingle sounding through the speakers.

Fukase and Oliver both stared in disbelief for a moment before the younger of the two bursted out laughing.

“Ha, see! You couldn’t even get past a little walking mushroom!”

“Shut up! I’ve never played this before...” Fukase grumbled as he unceremoniously threw the DS across the couch, body language showing total defeat. “It’s a stupid baby game, anyways...”

Oliver stuck his tongue out as he reached across the redhead to grab the handheld console, starting again immediately with newfound confidence. “Wow. A backseat gamer _and_ a sore loser. You continue to surprise me, Fuckass.”

Fukase hissed a _”Go to Hell!”_ and tried to ignore the way his cheeks burned with embarrassment as he watched Oliver easily defeat the Goomba’s, reaching the end of the level with ease. Somewhere in the distance, over the happy tune of the theme song, they heard Luka yell at them to watch their language.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so uh. did you know goomba’s are sentient mushrooms??
> 
> cause i didn’t until i wrote this.


	3. shitposts are coping mechanisms

“Why do you post so many of those things?”

Fukase, laying on his stomach, looked up from his phone and saw Oliver standing in the doorway. His own phone was in his hand, opened to Fukase’s Twitter feed, which consisted of nothing but overly-saturated pictures and total nonsense. It took a second for him to register what Oliver meant as he’d been way too focused on composing another Shiteyanyo meme.

“I always post them when I’m having a bad day.” He shrugged, and Oliver’s brows furrowed.

“But you post them everyday...”

Fukase continued to stare at Oliver with a blank expression. Silence filled the room, minus the metaphorical _”Whatcha Say”_ playing in the background.

After a moment, Oliver walked over and sat next to him. He patted Fukase’s head comfortingly as he pressed send on another cry for help— _I mean_ , shitpost.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SAME FUCKASS... SAME
> 
> based on this: https://youtu.be/hergREpUY4M


	4. all vocaloids are gay furries

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this ones a groupchat one bc i can! OwO gRrRr
> 
> seKAAAAI - miku  
> luknah - luka  
> kagamergirlbathwater - len  
> stoplen2020 - rin  
> ihavenorights - kaito  
> nicopikonii - piko  
> frick - fukase  
> ollie - oliver  
> geico - gakupo

_seKAAAAI is online_

**seKAAAAI:** hey, anyone up?

_luknah is online_

**luknah:** hello

_kagamergirlbathwater is online_

**kagamergirlbathwater:** ayeee

**seKAAAAI:** len PLEASE change ur screen name omg

**kagamergirlbathwater:** y tho

**luknah:** it’s disgusting

**seKAAAAI:** agreed

_stoplen2020 is online_

**stoplen2020:** also agreed

**kagamergirlbathwater:** rIN

**kagamergirlbathwater:** I THOUGHT YOU WERE ASLEEP

**stoplen2020:** surprise bitch

**luknah:** don’t you guys share a bedroom?

**stoplen2020:** unfortunately

**luknah:** sooo... you’re texting each other while you’re in the same room?

**kagamergirlbathwater:** p much

_nicopikonii is online_

**nicopikonii:** can u guys stop blowing up my phone? it’s literally 3 am

**luknah:** you should change your screen name too piko

**nicopikonii:** why???

**luknah:** it makes me want to bust your nico nico kneecaps

**seKAAAAI:** i think it’s cute

**kagamergirlbathwater:** OwO

_frick is online_

**frick:** do NOT “OwO” in this household

**kagamergirlbathwater:** where tf did you even come from fuckface

**frick:** i heard someone being a furry and as the furry police, it’s my duty to put a stop to it

**seKAAAAI:** what’s wrong with furries?

**frick:** they’re like kaito, they have no rights

**seKAAAAI:** ah

**seKAAAAI:** noted

_ihavenorights is online_

**ihavenorights:** what did i do? :(

**luknah:** you exist

**ihavenorights:** and that’s bad???

**luknah:** yes

**seKAAAAI:** yes

**stoplen2020:** absolutely

**kagamergirlbathwater:** yes

**frick:** you don’t even go here man

**ihavenorights:** :(

_ihavenorights is offline_

**nicopikonii:** that was kinda mean you guys..

**frick:** damn that’s wild piko, but tbh ion remember asking

**nicopikonii:** (ಠ ∩ಠ)

_ollie is online_

**ollie:** hi!

**luknah:** why are you still awake oliver?

**ollie:** i stole len’s xbox to play fortnite

**ollie:** you can’t just sleep when there’s fortnite to play

**kagamergirlbathwater:** SO THAT’S WHERE MY XBOX WENT

**ollie:** oops

**stoplen2020:** see? i told you i didn’t sell it

**seKAAAAI:** why would you want to sell it anyways?

**stoplen2020:** more money = one step closer to world domination

**seKAAAAI:** oh ok!

**frick:** so we just gonna ignore the fact that oliver plays fortnite

**ollie:** it’s a good game!

**luknah:** if it’s len’s xbox, that means he plays fortnite as well

**kagamergirlbathwater:** ...

**frick:** I-

**frick:** OH MY GOD

**kagamergirlbathwater:** sHUT UPPPP

**frick:** THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE

**seKAAAAI:** but it’s nighttime

**frick:** miku sweetie ur failing the vibe check

**stoplen2020:** since when was a vibe check in progress? i was not informed

**oliver:** if you think about it, we’re all vibe checked constantly throughout our lives. from the moment we’re born to the moment we die, society is vibe checking us all and if we fail, we are seen as the outcasts when really, we are all just little specks trying to survive in this cold, dark world.

**nicopikonii:** ...good point

**kagamergirlbathwater:** woah

**frick:** WOAH

**seKAAAAI:** how did u type a whole essay that fast

**luknah:** i’m too faded for this

_luknah is offline_

**ollie:** what does “faded” mean?

**frick:** ...

**frick:** ... :)

**seKAAAAI:** FUKASE NO

**frick:** I’M ABOUT TO END THIS MANS WHOLE CAREER

**seKAAAAI:** NOOOOOO

_seKAAAAI has blocked frick from the groupchat_

**kagamergirlbathwater:** oh thank god

**ollie:** wait no! :(

**ollie:** bring him back!!! :(((

**kagamergirlbathwater:** why? he’s an asshole

**ollie:** no! he’s my friend!!!!! :((((((

**stoplen2020:** so that’s what the kids are calling it these days

**kagamergirlbathwater:** fuckass? having FRIENDS? i HAVE to laugh

**ollie:** he’s my best friend

**ollie:** besides james!

**seKAAAAI:** are u sure he’s ONLY your friend, ollie? ;)

**ollie:** ...like i said, BEST friend!!!

**seKAAAAI:** hmm ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

**stoplen2020:** suuure

**kagamergirlbathwater:** ok boomer

**nicopikonii:** len he’s younger than you, how is he a boomer

**kagamergirlbathwater:** ...

_kagamergirlbathwater has blocked nicopikonii from the groupchat_

**stoplen2020:** it’s what he deserves

_luknah is online_

**luknah:** so y’all just blocking everyone huh

**seKAAAAI:** luka! you’re back? <3

**luknah:** kaito woke me up crying

**kagamergirlbathwater:** wow how rude of him

**luknah:** ikr so inconsiderate

_geico is online_

**geico:** unblock fukase

**stoplen2020:** how did you even know he was blocked u lizard

**geico:** ... first of all, bitch,

**geico:** it’s not a lizard, it’s a gecko

**geico:** second of all, he’s threatening arson

**seKAAAAI:** again?

**geico:** again.

**seKAAAAI:** UGH FINE

_seKAAAAI has unblocked frick from the groupchat_

**geico:** thanks

_geico is offline_

**kagamergirlbathwater:** so like, how old is gakupo anyways?

**luknah:** idk, mid thirties?

**stoplen2020:** oh ew

_ihavenorights is online_

**ihavenorights:** actually, me and gakupo are the same age! we’re both 21! :)

**luknah:** ...

**stoplen2020:** y’all hear sumn?

**seKAAAAI:** not a damn thing

**ollie:** ear machine broke

**luknah:** something was said...?

**kagamergirlbathwater:** i’m hellen keller in this bitch

**ihavenorights:** :(

_frick is online_

**frick:** okay first of all, fuck you guys,

**ollie:** that’s not nice, kase!

**kagamergirlbathwater:** and it’s gay

_frick has sent an image: UNO Reserve Card_

**frick:** ur mom

**seKAAAAI:** OHHHHHH

_luknah is offline_

**kagamergirlbathwater:** y’all made the only good person here leave again

**stoplen2020:** um hello? i’m right here?

**kagamergirlbathwater:** somebody said sumn...?

_frick has unblocked nicopikonii from the groupchat_

**seKAAAAI:** wait why?

**frick:** messing with furries is a hobby of mine

**nicopikonii:** I AM NOT A FURRY

**nicopikonii:** IF ANYONE HERE IS A FURRY, IT’S LEN

**kagamergirlbathwater:** HOW

**nicopikonii:** NEED I REMIND YOU OF “THE RUNAWAY OF LEN KAGAMINE”?

**kagamergirlbathwater:** THAT WAS A LONG TIME AGO

**nicopikonii:** it still counts

**ollie:** what’s a furry?

**fukase:** ... :)))

**seKAAAAI:** DON’T YOU DARE

**seKAAAAI:** I’LL BLOCK YOU AGAIN

**seKAAAAI:** I WON’T HESITATE BITCH

**nicopikonii:** watch your language around oliver

**ollie:** someone tell me!!! pleaseee???

**stoplen2020:** fukase don’t say a WORD

**stoplen2020:** a furry is someone who likes to draw or dress up as an animal but still act like a human

**stoplen2020:** they have “fursonas” and give them their own personality

**ollie:** oh! i have one of those!

**fukase:** you W H A T

**kagamergirlbathwater:** DJSKDSHDHSJ

**kagamergirlbathwater:** YOU’RE JOKING RIGHT

**ollie:** no???

**kagamergirlbathwater:** I CAN’T BREATHE

**frick:** OLIVER WHY

**ollie:** because it’s fun!

**frick:** I-

**stoplen2020:** wow fuckboi

**stoplen2020:** looks like ur bf is a furry

**frick:** HE’S NOT MY BOYFRIEND

**seKAAAAI:** you just keep telling urself that

**frick:** HE’S NOT

**frick:** I’M NOT GAY

**seKAAAAI:** i am

**stoplen2020:** yeah same

**kagamergirlbathwater:** me too

**nicopikonii:** same here

_geico is online_

**geico:** ditto

_luknah is online_

**luknah:** bitch me too

**frick:** wait

**frick:** deadass?

**luknah:** yeah, every vocaloid is gay

**frick:** like, on god?

**luknah:** yep

**frick:** huh

**ihavenorights:** i am too!

_frick, kagamergirlbathwater, stoplen2020, seKAAAAI and luknah are all typing..._

**all but ihavenorights, ollie and nicopikonii:** 1-800-did-i-ask

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> BRUH FORMATTING THIS WAS THE WORST
> 
> btw i don’t have anything against furries or kaito, i just based this off of the groupchats i’m in lmao


	5. allergies suck, but budding feelings are kinda nice

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ariana (me) has no idea how celebrities work, especially when they’re not real. she abuses the word “cough” and is VERY cliché.
> 
> fukase’s an idiot and almost diddly darn dies
> 
> piko panics and sleeps
> 
> vflower is a WHOLE ASS MOM
> 
> oliver is Traumatized™️ and Full Of Love
> 
> and then there’s a lil smooch (*´σ з｀) ～♪
> 
> that’s it! that’s the chapter!

The cookies Gumi made that had been set out for the after party were gradually being devoured from the plate they sat on. Fukase had previously been too absorbed in his conversation about working together on a song with Rin to give them a second thought, but once she spotted Miku across the room and dashed off, he shrugged and grabbed one, pulling out his phone to keep himself occupied.

Parties were usually his scene, but this one was more of a celebratory get-together for the last show of their tour going well. This meant that he would rather stick in a small group of two or three, or by himself, against the wall.

Absentmindedly nibbling as he scrolled through his phone, he smirked at some of the excited comments made on their performances. Of course, the majority were about Miku, Luka and the Kagamine twins, but his name showed up a few times, as well as Oliver’s. He didn’t know why that made him feel a little pride for both himself and the blonde British boy, but it did.

He quickly finished the cookie off and began to type replies to the comments he was mentioned in, but stopped when he sensed that something was... off. His chest had a strange, tingling sensation, and his throat felt as if it was getting tighter somehow. He tried to brush it off as he retweeted some nice feedback he got, but soon, it was becoming increasingly harder to manage.

He coughed into his hand, thinking it would relieve some of the weird pressure on his chest. It didn’t — if anything, it made the tightness in his throat even worse, and his lungs began to burn a bit, like they weren’t getting enough oxygen. He looked around himself. There was a lot of people, chatting and laughing and making the room a bit stuffy. Coughing again, he opened the door to the balcony and slid out, hoping fresh air would help.

Cool breeze hit his skin, which made him realize just how warm he was starting to feel. He took off his jacket and chucked it into an outside chair, trying to take a few deep breathes, but it seemed like the coughing wasn’t coming to an end anytime soon. He could hear a little wheeze from his lungs every time he inhaled, which prompted him to lean over the bars of the balcony for support, one hand to his chest.

That’s when he started to feel an itching sensation in his mouth, specifically on his lips and at the back of his throat. Before he could question what in the world was going on, Piko came outside as well, clearly worried.

“Hey, uh, you alright? You’re not, like, choking or anything, are you?”

Fukase jumped at the sudden voice, even if his ears were mostly hearing his own racing heartbeat. He tried his best to keep the next round of coughs down. He didn’t like people fussing over him.

“Y-yeah, I’m _fi-fine_ , just—“ Despite his best efforts, he coughed again, this time sounding deep and painful.

“What’s going on?”

Flower came to stand by Piko, her arms crossed. Fukase wanted to answer with something sarcastic, along the lines of _”This is it, I somehow contracted Ebola and it’s the end for me”_ , but his vision was starting to get blurry as tears and what felt like swelling around his cheeks became yet another problem.

“Fuka—?” The moment that Fukase turned to face his friends, fear on his features, Piko’s skin went paler, if that was even possible. “What’s wrong with your face?!”

Just as he had suspected, the area around his eyes had began to swell up, as well as his cheeks. If that wasn’t the worst part, an outbreak of pink splotches began to slowly crawl down his neck, starting at his lips, which still itched like all Hell.

By the time Piko had yelled, a crowd had formed around them, all staring in shock as Fukase continued to desperately hack and wheeze, the rash growing darker as his cheeks went red from the embarrassment of all eyes turned on him and the fact that he hadn’t breathed properly in at least a couple of minutes. Flower quickly ran to him and grabbed him by his collar, checking over his symptoms. Her eyes were impossibly wide as she looked away from him to the others.

“It’s an allergic reaction of some kind. Someone call an ambulance.”

Maybe it was the abruptness of this whole situation, or maybe it was his intense fear of hospitals, that made Fukase’s knees buckle underneath him. Flower caught him, maneuvering him to sit against the balcony bars. She was asking him something urgent, but between his damn-near unstoppable coughs and the lightheadedness making his ears feel clogged with cotton, he couldn’t respond even if he wanted to. His brain was swimming, his skin was boiling and everything was itchy, tight and fucking _scary._

He looked around. Miku was currently on the phone with paramedics, explaining everything she knew. A few others simply gaped in awe and terror. 

He noticed, briefly, that Oliver was one of these few, being physically held back by Len as if he wanted to be by Fukase’s side.

Then, the world started to fade around him, tunnels of black forming around his already impaired vision. Flower shook him by the shoulders a few times, but it felt distant, and certainly not enough to keep him awake. 

The last thing he remembered before slipping off into unconsciousness was Oliver’s terrified shriek wrapping itself in his mind.

* * *

When Fukase opened his eyes again, he was met with the annoyingly bright fluorescent lights that only hospitals had. He groaned, his throat dry but thankfully not constricted anymore. His chest was sore, as well as his head. Faintly, he noticed the IV stuck into his right arm, and the beeping of a machine monitoring his heart rate.

“He’s awake!”

Oliver had practically scrambled to his feet from his chair to stand by the hospital bed as soon as he saw Fukase show a sign of life. Flower gently moved Piko’s head from her shoulder, where the silver-haired boy had been napping, to walk over to the two of them.

“How are you feeling?” Fukase groaned again, his voice coming out even raspier than usual. 

“Like a million dollars, plus tax.” He joked, despite the pain becoming worse as he woke up more. “What happened?”

Oliver tugged on his sleeve, a nervous habit of his. “The doctor said it was ana— anafilo—“

“Anaphylactic shock.” Flower supplied. “You’re allergic to peanuts, dude. And you’re lucky to be alive.” 

Fukase scrunched up his nose in confusion.

“Peanuts? But I didn’t...”

As realization hit him, he sighed.

“The goddamn cookies.”

Flower let out a sympathetic laugh, nodding her head in confirmation. “Gumi sends her deepest apologies. She had no idea.”

Honestly, it wasn’t like she could’ve known and, either way, they were delicious, so he wasn’t at all upset. Fukase shrugged, despite how heavy his arms felt. “It’s fine. I didn’t, either.”

A tense silence filled the room, besides the beeps and bloops of hospital equipment and Piko’s soft snores. Flower’s gaze darted between Fukase and Oliver for a moment before she turned and walked to the door. “I’ll go get you some water.”

Once the door was closed behind her and they were alone, Oliver let out a shaky breath.

“You scared me. Badly.” He said, eyes downcast to Fukase’s IV. His cheeks had tear tracks on them, and he clearly hadn’t slept, even though they had to have been there for quite a while. Fukase’s throat tightened again, but this time, it wasn’t from the allergen.

“I know. I scared me, too.” His voice was soft as he moved Oliver’s hand from his sleeve, intertwining their fingers together instead. If he was asked about it later, he’d blame it on the effects of the painkillers, even though they had long since worn off.

Oliver sniffled, trying time stifle more tears. Finally, he met Fukase’s eyes. “I’m really glad you’re okay, Kase.”

Before Fukase could make a remark of how _of course_ he was okay, a silly little peanut couldn’t kill him, his lips were captured by Oliver’s. It was a quick peck, not lasting more than a second, but it was enough time for him to take in how soft Oliver’s lips were and taste the sweetness of strawberries mixed with the saltiness of tears. As soon as Oliver pulled away, leaving Fukase dumbfounded and wordless, Flower was back again, holding a paper cup full of water.

He took it gratefully, but stopped a moment before drinking it. His lips were tingling once more, like they had been when the rash had started to spread, but this was so much different. He felt his heart flutter in his chest as he brought a hand up to trace the outline of his lips.

Flower made an off-hand joke about how the rash was long gone, and he didn’t have to worry about it damaging his looks. Instead of replying, not trusting himself to form a coherent sentence, he took a quick drink of water and made a mental note to remind Oliver to not eat PB&J’s if he was gonna do... _that_ again.


	6. fukase has dimples. i don’t make the rules i just enforce ‘em

“What are you _doing._ ”

That’s what Fukase attempted to say but, due to the two small index fingers poking at his cheeks, it sounded more like _”Wuh a’ yo’ doon’.”_

Oliver, currently sprawled across Fukase’s lap as they sat in an armchair, smiled at the childish way off speech. He stretched out Fukase’s mouth into a smile as well.

“You’re squishy.”

The redhead furrowed his brows. He knew he had a baby face, (damn genetics), but hearing that come from Oliver was even more insulting than if someone like Flower or Len, people who actually looked their age, had said it.

“Yo’ one to tawk.”

“No, I meant—“ Oliver’s fingers moved a bit higher on Fukase’s cheeks, just below his scars. There, two small indents were slightly visible, even with Fukase no longer smiling.

“The dimples, they make you squishy. It’s cute.”

Fukase felt the heat rise to his neck and ears. His dimples had only ever come up in conversation when people made fun of them and, from what he could tell, Oliver wasn’t trying to tease. He seemed genuine.

“Than’ yo’...?”

Oliver continued to prod for a few moments, simply testing out just how many silly expressions he could make Fukase do with his dimples still visible. Then, he leaned over, planting a quick peck on the left dimple, lips brushing against the scars just slightly.

Even though Oliver pulled his hands away and his face was no longer being scrunched up, Fukase found it hard to speak. He shivered. “I-...”

Oliver giggled. “Cat got your tongue?”

 _More like stupid British blonde has my stupid heart_ , Fukase thought, and then mentally chided himself for how lame that sounded. Why did feeling... _something_ for someone make you so _corny?_

He nodded, still dazed, dimpled cheeks just as red as the rest of him.

“Yeah, something like that...”


	7. c a b b a g e

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> when ur bf sleep walks and u sleep talk #relationshipsgoalz

Fukase woke up abruptly once his bedside alarm clock struck 3:08 A.M, his throat dry. He sat up and, somewhere in a blurry haze of drowsiness, began to remember patches of his dream. 

_He was in his own room, dark and alone, except for something standing stock still in the corner. He felt his body tense with fear, but firmly stood his ground._

_“This is MY yogurt, Satan.”_

_Whatever stood in the corner cocked it’s head to the side curiously. Then, slowly, it descended from the shadows, showing itself. Fukase gasped._

_The Red Lady._

That’s when he woke up, confused and in serious need of water. Standing and stretching just slightly, he maneuvered his way through the messy floor, eyeing the corner where he previously saw her before stepping out into the hallway and descending the stairs.

Why did he dream about her so much? Who even was she?

As much as it bugged him that dreams with her in them kept reoccurring without any explanation, he decided those were questions that could be answered once his vocal chords didn’t feel like they were being rubbed with sandpaper made from the Sahara Desert.

The walk to the kitchen wasn’t far, thankfully. He bumped into a few walls on the way, asking _”Who builds a wall in a place like this?”_ to no one in particular before continuing to sleepily trudge along. Once he heard the familiar buzz of the refrigerator, he reached for the light switch. Sliding his hand across the cold wall, he found it and flicked it to life.

He nearly jumped a mile when he saw someone already standing there. For a moment, he wondered if he was still dreaming, and The Red Lady wasn’t done tormenting him just yet. He blinked, taking a closer look and seeing something a lot less frightening than that — platinum blonde hair.

“Oliver??”

Said blonde, stood at the counter, had his back turned to Fukase, not acknowledging him even when his name was called. From where Fukase was, he could see the handle of a big butcher knife in Oliver’s hand and small, green leaves gathered messily around the chopping block. _Is that... cabbage?_

“Hey, uh...” Fukase folded his arms and leaned against the doorway, even more puzzled than before. “Any reason you’re just... up, chopping vegetables so late?”

Oliver didn’t answer again, instead continuing to insistently chop up the cabbage. Fukase, growing impatient and a little more than disturbed, stomped his foot.

“Oliver, nē! I’m talking to you!”

Walking over to him, Fukase went to shake Oliver and grab his attention, when he noticed something even more odd.

His eyes were closed.

_Is he sleepwalking?_

The redhead took a step back, assessing the situation. That had to be the case, considering Oliver was still clad in his pajamas, and he’d never pass up an opportunity to have a conversation no matter the hour. He was quite a talkative guy.

Despite his shock, it soon set in that technically, even though his body was awake, Oliver’s mind was still asleep. And he had acquired a knife that could easily kill someone with one stab. Fukase clicked his tongue, trying his best not to completely lose his shit.

“Oooookay, let’s put this down,” Cautiously, Fukase grabbed the knife out of Oliver’s hand, thanking every God he knew of that Oliver hadn’t sliced a finger off. “and get you back to bed.”

He gently set his hands on Oliver’s shoulders, hoping it didn’t wake him. He forgot where he heard it, but apparently, if you wake up a sleepwalker, there could be serious consequences, such as them lashing out on you or even having a heart attack. Those were the last things Fukase wanted to happen. He took a step back to the entrance of the kitchen when Oliver showed no signs of waking, forgetting about his mission to get water completely.

Slowly, with Oliver in tow, Fukase made his way back to the long path of complex hallways. He stopped, eyes flickering from one room to another. _Sigh._

He had no idea where Oliver’s room was.

_Christ on a stick._

Logically, he could have simply lead Oliver to the couch, but there was a concert coming up soon, and none of them could afford the soprano getting sick. Not thinking twice about it, Fukase carefully started pushing Oliver upstairs, making their way to his own room instead.

Once again, when Fukase opened the door, he checked the corner. When he saw no one, he took Oliver’s hand and stepped in front of him, moving away anything that could make the other trip. He let Oliver stand idly as he pulled back the covers. 

With a hand to the middle of Oliver’s back, Fukase gently guided him to lay down. Once the British boy looked settled, laying on his back, he laid down as well, leaving some distance between them and tucking the covers around them both.

 _“If he freaks out in the morning, I’ll just tell him I was doing him a favor,”_ Fukase mused to himself, then cringed when he realized how dirty that sounded. Shaking away his thoughts and putting his arms behind his head, he tried to calm himself, eyes closing as he listened to Oliver’s soft and even breathing.

He was nearly asleep when Oliver began to shuffle around. It didn’t sound like simple tossing and turning, though — it seemed like he was... moving closer?

Without any warning, Fukase felt something small and warm lay on his chest. His eyes shot open in surprise and he looked down. It was indeed Oliver, head placed on top of his heart and hands tucked under his chin. He looked peaceful and cozy. In turn, it made Fukase relax as well.

He felt a fluttering in his stomach as he reached out and tucked a stray bang behind Oliver’s ear. It was comfortable, in a way that Fukase hadn’t felt since his dreams had all turned twisted and sinister. He closed his eyes again with a little sigh, taking in the nice feeling for as long as he could as Oliver contently smiled.

Once he managed to fall back asleep with Oliver cuddled close to him, Fukase didn’t have any more dreams about The Red Lady that night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> apparently, i talk AND walk in my sleep. i’m the full package.
> 
> based on dis if ur confused ฅ(ٛ•௰• ٛ ): https://youtu.be/k6eJKdgu2BA


	8. DESGUSTANG (songfic :0)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oliver turns fukase from a bandit to a baby
> 
> based on dis song: https://youtu.be/gH3NRi5oSPU
> 
> uwuwuwuwuwuwuwwu

_It’s disgusting, how I love you!_

At first, Fukase refused to use the word “love”. He did not, and I repeat, **DID NOT** love Oliver. He simply... Liked him. A whole lot. In a completely platonic way. 

So what if he wanted to hold his hand, ask him about his day, be around him all the time and maybe kiss him (again)?

Totally platonic. Totally not love.

_God, I hate it! I could kill you!_

Oliver could be really, really, really, _really_ annoying when he wanted to be. Maybe it was puberty, maybe it was a British thing. Whatever it was, Oliver could really push Fukase’s buttons.

For instance, Oliver poked him until he snapped, hid things just to frustrate him and, most annoyingly of all, pretended he was invisible while talking to everyone but him.

He was the most irritating person Fukase had ever met besides Len. So...

Why did he still want Oliver around him more than anyone?

_Cause you’re messing up my name..._

“Call me Fuckass one more time, **I dare you.”**

Oliver was pinned under a very angry Fukase.

“...Fuckass.”

A quick kick to the shin and Oliver made his escape, running for his life. Fukase held his knee, trying to sound menacing but failing miserably due to the laugh he couldn’t conceal in his voice.

**”COME HERE YOU LITTLE—“**

_Gotta walk my talk, my fame..._

Performing with Oliver was beyond fun. Their energies matched up well, and the crowd seemed to love it, with cheers and applause. Their voices went together perfectly, with a high pitch and a low pitch, creating the perfect medium. Not to mention how Oliver looked at him, with enthusiasm and pure joy. It made Fukase’s heart speed up even faster, though he’d never admit it.

Overall, Oliver was his favorite person to preform with, without a doubt.

_But I just wanna touch your face!_

Being backstage with Oliver was less fun, because it was at that time that Fukase could see the flush on Oliver’s cheeks from the dancing, the satisfied smile from another show well done and a sparkle in his eyes, ready for more. 

As tradition, they caught their breath over a bottle of water and some snacks while sitting in one of their dressing rooms. This time, it was Oliver’s.

They chatted nonchalantly for a bit, the sound of other Vocaloid’s voices and the audiences’ screams still loud and clear. Tonight, they were one of the first performers, though they were usually in the middle or last. Which means, for the next hour and a half, they had to find a way to kill time...

Eventually, they settled on a game of 20 questions, which Fukase kept losing due to the fact that he couldn’t think straight _(literally)_ with Oliver sitting so close to him. However, on the fifth round, Oliver stopped him mid-question, his face full of nerves as he stared down at the floor.

“I just wanted to say... You were amazing tonight.”

And that’s when Fukase, brain already short-circuiting before, metaphorically flatlined. Oliver was now looking back up at him with hope in his eyes and a blush on his cheeks that definitely wasn’t from the exercise on stage.

“I...”

_”Say something! He’s looking at you! Say SOMETHING, YOU IDIOT!”_

“I... Uh... Right back at’cha.”

_”NOT THAT, JESUS CHRIST.”_

Despite Fukase mentally strangling himself for the dumbest response in the world, Oliver only giggled, stating it was his turn to ask the 20 questions. Fukase, again, couldn’t concentrate, because Oliver could somehow make his heart beat faster and also stop. He felt embarrassed and relaxed around the blonde all at once. His palms were sweaty, his cheeks were burning and he realized, begrudgingly, that he _maybe..._

Just a _little_ bit...

He might... Like Oliver. In a “more than just _like_ ” way.

Possibly even _like-like._

Possibly even _**love...**_

_It’s **DISGUSTING!**_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> kesha used to be my shit omg... i rediscovered this song after YEARS and this was made immediately after
> 
> also 2 things!
> 
> 1: fucker u need to learn how to accept LOVE ฅ⁽͑ ˚̀ ˙̭ ˚́ ⁾̉ฅ
> 
> 2: i promise the next one of these will be shown in ollie’s perspective bc THIS BOI IS HEART EYES FOR FUCKER


End file.
